I know this is probably said a lot, but it is really important to just focus on the positives in your life, instead of focusing too much on the negatives and letting them get you down too easily, helping you maintain an overall positive attitude and a great sense of inner calm. It’s something I myself certainly have a problem with and want to, need to work on, and I think it’s important also as it is unfair on and undermines the positive things in your life, if you are letting these negative, unsignificant things get in the way of them so easily. I say this particularly thinking of those negative things that may annoy you or irritate you, but aren’t actually affecting you or the positive things, at least not in the long-term, and only are getting in the way of the image of them if you let them.
It must, however, be said that ofcourse it is completely normal and expected to have negative thoughts and opinions on stuff, after all, we are only human, and have these things called “emotions” as in a range of them, and it is normal to ofcourse voice them, but I think if the things that annoy or irritate you are not major, but basically just annoying or irritating rather than a matter of being anger filled, then it should only be kept to a certain extent. For instance, if something annoys me, but is not a major issue affecting me, and I am too excessive in my moaning and extreme and angry in my reactions, I realize this is wrong, and that really what I should be doing is just calmly and gently making 1 or two remarks on the matter, or even explaining a little, especially if there are anecdotes involved, but as long as I stay calm and gentle while expressing my views on the matter, how it does annoy me, but not making a big deal out of it, not getting too emotional and affected by it, because it is irrational and unreasonable ofcourse if I do. I realize it’s not good for my health either, as I am using up waaaayyy too much negative energy and it is also not fair on the other people I am expressing this to. Being hypersensitive and OCD, this is a major flaw and concern of mine, and while not everyone may be exactly like this, it is still important that they focus more on the positives in their lives and not let the stupid, insignificant negative things get to them or bother them too much. You’ve got to think as well, like I try to, that at the end of the day, that things may have annoyed me and had a negative impact on me, but at least it’s not affecting the positive things, which I’ve still got, it’s not important in my life, it’s over now and I’ve got to just focus on the positives otherwise it won’t be doing me any good and will be rather unhealthy if I keep getting hung up like this.
You just need to keep that inner calm, as in not just acting like everything is perfect and like there’s no problems in the world at all, but just keeping the extent of your negative reactions and feelings to a minimum really, controlling them so you are still realistically explaining how things are, but in a calmer manner when doing so. I worry I have had a habit at times of moaning too much too, not necessarily always being anger-filled, but just sounding negative too much, repeating myself, and I hate to think I just seem like I’m being negative, as I really don’t want to be one of those miserable, negative, moaning old lady/man types of people. That’s another thing, to not bore on. Just summarise things if you have to, into the odd sentence or two, and maybe try and add some positive into it like “oh well, hopefully it’ll get better” or just moving onto more positive things in some way or another, or even making a bit of a laugh out of it by adding some humour in there.
It also helps you grow as a person more, as the more you focus on these positive, important things and forget the insignificant, negative things, then you will develop more into this calmer, more positive and reasonable, sensible person. There are also suggested meditation techniques you can try, to discover inner calm, so you feel calmer, but you can also try by just thinking of these various strategies aforementioned on how to manage your emotions, by just putting things into perspective, looking at this in a realistic, constructive approach. It’s a bit like constructive criticism; there’s bound to be negatives to discuss, but you’ve got to have a reasonable, calm attitude when doing so, and maybe add positives in there if possible like “oh well at least I’ve learnt from that now” or suggest how this certain thing that annoyed you should’ve been, in a calm manner ofcourse.